I must admit that sometimes a 4 or 6 yr old can teach you some of life’s biggest lessons. Lessons that need to be learned before they have lasting effects on my children’s ways of thinking.
Last year was the first time I wore a 2 piece swimsuit since having kids. And thanks to one of my best friends, I actually had the guts to wear it in front of people, mostly because I knew I would never see these people again.
The other day, while getting ready to head out to the pool, I made a negative comment about myself in reference to me wearing my 2 piece. I was not prepared for what my younger 2 kids would say.
I’ve been so self conscious of my stretch marks for as long as I can remember having them. I don’t know too many women who aren’t self conscious. There’s too much perfection around us. We see something other than what the media portrays as perfect and we deem ourselves flawed. We see our imperfections as ugly. We dwell on them, and spend tons of money trying to cover or remove them. As if our worth comes from that.
“They’re just baby scratches mom,” said my 4 year old Trey.
He didn’t relate my stretch marks to being ugly, or out of the normal. They didn’t change how much he loved me. He saw the reason behind them and nothing else. Why can’t I?
“Who cares what you’re wearing. Swimming is about having fun, and you’re beautiful mom,” said my 6 year old Mekai.
Once again, these kids are not judging me based on my appearance. I am. I am relaying the message to them that their future wives will have less value or beauty if their body changes after having kids. I’m showing them that I don’t respect and love myself just the way God created me to be. I’m showing them that we should be ashamed when we don’t fit the worldly mold of perfection.
I have shown them how to be healthy and active. I’ve shown them how to eat what God has created and how to grow it ourselves. I’ve been a good example of how to treat your body the way God designed it to be treated. But in that moment, I realized I was showing them that it wasn’t enough. That I am not enough. And someday, they might not be enough based on outward appearances. They may miss out on an amazing marriage because I’ve taught them that physical beauty trumps the inward beauty!
I’m all for loving ourselves. But it’s so much deeper than that. It’s about loving our Creator so deeply, that we love who and what He created. We need to accept the fact that His love for us is unmeasurable, and trust his design and plans for our lives.
Whether it be scars, or skin discoloration, or you think your nose is too big, or boobs too saggy, feet too big, hair too thin, belly too big, eyes too brown. Whatever your hang up about yourself is…..that’s not how God sees you, neither should you! The enemy wants us to dwell on the outward, because it prevents us from cultivating our inner beauty. It breeds jealousy, and convinces us to compare ourselves to others.
He created every inch of your being!
Praise Him for it.
Have no regrets.